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The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.
Remember...
The only thing that flat earthers have to fear is sphere itself...
The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.
BEAUTY PARLOR
A place where women curl up and dye.
CHICKENS
The only animal you eat before they are born and after they are dead.
COMMITTEE
A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.
DUST
Mud with the juice squeezed out.
EGOTIST
Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.
HANDKERCHIEF
Cold Storage.
INFLATION
Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.
MOSQUITO
An insect that makes you like flies better.
POLITICAL CORRECTNESS
A doctrine fostered by a delusional, illogical minority.
RAISIN
A grape with a sunburn.
SECRET
A story you tell to one person at a time.
TOOTHACHE
The pain that drives you to extraction.
TOMORROW
One of the greatest labor saving devices of today.
YAWN
An honest opinion - openly expressed.
WRINKLES
Something other people have… similar to my character lines.
OLD
I very quietly confided to my friend that I was having an Affair
She turned to me and asked, "Are you having it catered?"
. . and that, my friend, is the definition of 'OLD'!!!
In youth, the days are short and the years are long.
In old age, the years are short and days are long.
The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.
With a very seductive voice the woman asked her husband,
"Have you ever seen twenty dollars all crumpled up?"
"No," said her husband.
She gave him a sexy little smile, unbuttoned the top 3 or 4 buttons of her blouse, and slowly reached down into the cleavage created by a soft, silky push-up bra, and pulled out a crumpled twenty-dollar bill. He took the crumpled banknote from her and smiled approvingly.
She then asked him, "Have you ever seen fifty dollars all crumpled up?"
"Uh... no, I haven't," he said, with an anxious tone in his voice.
She gave him another sexy little smile, pulled up her skirt, and seductively reached into her tight, sheer panties... and pulled out a crumpled fifty-dollar bill.
He took the crumpled banknote and started breathing a little quicker with anticipation.
"Now," she said, "have you ever seen $100,000 dollars all crumpled up?"
He said "No!" trying to hide his arousal.
She said ..... "Check the garage.
A Russian wife turned to her husband and asked, "What's this special military operation our glorious leader keeps talking about?"
Her husband replied, "He says it's a war to stop America and NATO."
"Oh, right. How's it going?"
"Well, so far we have lost over 20 generals, over 315,000 troops killed or wounded, 3000 tanks, 300 aircraft, hundreds of helicopters, countless armoured vehicles, artillery and trucks, our flagship along with other naval ships, our army is being defeated in most areas and we have had to resort to conscripting 500,000 Russians including murderers and rapists to replace our losses."
"Wow, what about America and NATO?"
"Dunno, they haven't turned up yet."
The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.
The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.
A mate of mine phoned me and asked, "What are you doing at the moment?"
I replied, "Right now? Probably failing my driving test."
The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.
The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.
Death smiles at everyone. Grumpy old men smile back.
Death smiles at everyone. Grumpy old men smile back.
Death smiles at everyone. Grumpy old men smile back.
The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.
Death smiles at everyone. Grumpy old men smile back.
Standing at the beach with my grandson when a beautiful, buxome brunette in a skimpy bikini walked by.
"Wow...look at her!" he exclaimed.
I told him "Mate, it's not polite to point like that in public. Just use your finger next time."
The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.
A red indian introduced me to his wife..
"This is my wife, Four Horses."
"Wow, what a lovely name. What does it mean?"
"Nag..nag..nag..nag!"
The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.
A man came home from work and found his three children outside, still in their pajamas, playing in the mud, with empty food boxes and wrappers strewn all around the front yard. The door of his wife's car was open, as was the front door to the house and there was no sign of the dog.
Proceeding into the entry, he found an even bigger mess. A lamp had been knocked over, and the throw rug was wadded against one wall. In the front room the TV was loudly blaring a cartoon channel, and the family room was strewn with toys and various items of clothing. In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink, breakfast food was spilled on the counter, the fridge door was open wide, dog food was spilled on the floor, a broken glass lay under the table, and a small pile of sand was spread by the back door.
He quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over toys and more piles of clothes, looking for his wife. He was worried she might be ill, or that something serious had happened. He was met with a small trickle of water as it made its way out the bathroom door. As he peered inside he found wet towels, scummy soap and more toys strewn over the floor. Miles of toilet paper lay in a heap and toothpaste had been smeared over the mirror and walls.
As he rushed to the bedroom, he found his wife still curled up in the bed in her pajamas, reading a novel. She looked up at him, smiled, and asked how his day went. He looked at her bewildered and asked, ‘What happened here today?'
She again smiled and answered, "You know every day when you come home from work and you ask me what in the world I do all day?"
"Yes," was his incredulous reply.
She answered, "Well, today I didn't do it."
The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.
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